You’re right of course. What we are taught is, the “Perfect Love” has no desire for anyone else. The “One” fills all the holes in our life. We impose our conditions of the ‘perfect’ romance, the ‘perfect’ Love, and the ‘perfect’ life we’ve created in our heads. You can have my time, my attention, my Love and sex, if and only if, you pay attention to me…and only me. It’s all about ME. Forsake all others. We perceive our cup as only being filled with “one”, but not many.
Ok, I get that. Sure, I want it to be about me too. I want to feel Loved and cherished and adored and…well yeah I want to feel special. Don’t we all?
I just don’t agree with it.
Women have incredible power this way over men. We have what they want. Trouble is I don’t particularly want that power. I don’t want to ‘control’ another. Mostly because I don’t want attempts at trying to control me.
Yep, the ‘relationship’, or romantic Love for another always comes with conditions doesn’t it? Sad but true. I don’t want to put conditions on Love and affection and holding another’s heart in my hand….because when we do, we say the conditions matter more than the heart we hold.
I reject that idea. That’s NOT love. It’s manipulation.
I can’t live that way. I won’t live that way. I won’t impose it. I won’t ask for it.
The funny thing is…when we don’t impose these conditions on our Love/Lover/boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other…we’re accused of not caring…we’re looked at as being unable to “commit”, or worse yet of not being loyal. We somehow cannot give all of ourselves to the desired state of “The Relationship”.
If I give all of myself to you, right now in this moment of time. And in the next occurring moment of time for as long as those consecutive moments last…is that not good enough? And if I share some part of myself with another, be it emotionally, physically, spiritually or intellectually for a moment in time or some number of consecutive moments in time…has that taken anything away from you? Has it somehow robbed you of my Love?
Maybe I’m hopelessly idealistic. Maybe not. Maybe I just want to live my life this way because it feels right.
We all have ‘conditions’. These are mine.
When it comes right down to it, you don’t have to live with me or my ideals. But I do…