So where it is?
Where is the line between being able to honestly express feelings and biting my tongue to be kind, loving and supportive?
Do I say nothing at all?
Do I just reserve it hoping it doesn’t fester later?
Or is it all about someone else not wanting to hear they fucked up?
My lesson is life is continual work on monitoring my re-action and thinking before I speak. I get that.
BUT, There is some bullshit in all of this for me. Everyone else is allowed to express themselves….say whatever the fuck they want whenever they want…in the name of speaking the “truth”.
But I’m told not to take anything personally. I can’t be this or that, or feel this or that, I can’t say this or that in this way or that way.
Can I never express how I feel?
Do I *always* have to monitor myself simply because another person doesn’t want to hear what needs to be said?
You would rather have me do a slow simmer and then punish you in some other way later. No, you would rather I have no reaction. Sorry, that is not always possible.
Better I say what I mean, get it over with, and move the fuck on…let it go.
For whatever reason, you are not supposed to be here today.
I think I am allowed to be angry you missed your flight, and disappointed over you not getting here today. But I’m not going to let it linger too long either.
Could you have a little trust that I won’t remain angry for any length of time?