putting responsibility where it belongs

Letting everyone know where I am going and when I am coming back isn’t an issue especially with the kids here.  It’s also somewhat of a safety move on my part.

What isn’t fine is if I have a change of plans, or want to change my plans.   That ends up fucking with their plans.  I end up feeling bad it didn’t work out for them, but plenty resentful and angry at the same time for playing along with his avoidance game in my house.  For having to find something to do until such and such time or I get a text that he is gone.

Yes, I know I bring those emotions on myself.  I’m undecided if those emotions are reasonable or unreasonable.  What I do know is I cannot and will not do it anymore because: him not being here when I am here was solely HID DECISION. He can live by it, or change it.  Whether he is here or not should not be a major consideration in living my life.

If my roommate wants some private time, she can ask and if I can swing it, I will. But there are no guarantees. Shit happens and I should be allowed to be in my own house whenever I need to be.

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