Category Archives: Relationships

complexities

coming home…

As it is and always will be… My heart coming home. Anam Cara. I am always awed, touched, humbled by the depth and intensity of our hearts together. We hugged and cried and laughed and kissed and reminisced and talked … Continue reading

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35 years and counting

Glad we both made it unscathed-relatively speaking. Tomorrow is my oldest sons 35th birthday so I went to Denver today to spend some time with him, my Darling DIL and the Grandbabies. Good day. Lots of Grandma’s treat Ice Cream. … Continue reading

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healing

Thank you for the healing, my beloved Anam Cara. Not that I’m surprised. Your visits have been too many in too short a time. I needed to hear from you today.  Needed you to open the door and allow me … Continue reading

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dust in the wind…..

Musings from a past life…. Over the past 8 years and after the breakup of my last marriage of 15 years, I have found deeper intimacy and in turn deeper love than I ever thought possible with “solo poly”. I … Continue reading

Posted in Ponderings, Relationships | 1 Comment

not easy

Nope.  I’m not easy.  But, I’m not particularly difficult, either.  Complicated? Well….I prefer to think of it as…many faceted.  I’m human, after all. My love of Black n White notwithstanding…..Few things in life are actually black and white. Mostly, I … Continue reading

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…..

“If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy. If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing. If she’s worth it, you wont give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy. … Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just … Continue reading

Posted in Along the Continuum, Passion, Relationships | 1 Comment

a microscopic truth

As I peel back the layers I find many microscopic truths. My truths. Monogamy: Been there, done that and it worked; until it didn’t. My criteria for practicing monogamy is pretty narrow.  If it weren’t,  I would use some other … Continue reading

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clarifying

what I am not willing to do: begrudge you attempt to make you choose compete for you tell you what you want to hear be someone I’m not for anyone’s benefit be dishonest about how I feel, regardless of what … Continue reading

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putting responsibility where it belongs

Letting everyone know where I am going and when I am coming back isn’t an issue especially with the kids here.  It’s also somewhat of a safety move on my part. What isn’t fine is if I have a change … Continue reading

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sniffing bellies

If you attempt to roll someone over and they acquiesce, does it mean you’ve “won” and they have “lost”? Be careful with that assumption. Sometimes it’s better to give the appearance of rolling over and letting someone else sniff your … Continue reading

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through the looking glass

I talked to my roommate about this. And then sent it along to his metamour.  I know my roommate heard me, and understands.  The other acknowledges there is truth in the below. But we have not talked face to face.  … Continue reading

Posted in Journal Entry, polyamory, Relationships | 2 Comments

First

I’ve decided I’m not objective enough or supportive enough. My own filters and experiences are seriously getting in the way especially the past two weeks. Still not feeling very gracious towards him. Even tho I’ve voiced this to her, and … Continue reading

Posted in Mastery Through Accomplishment, Reflections in the Mirror, Relationships | 1 Comment

vindicated

It makes my heart hurt. To have been doubted. To have been dismissed as jealous and possessive when I spoke to what I saw or heard, and knew in my heart to be true. It hurts he would think of … Continue reading

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Not…..

It is not what it appears. I understand being fallible and have empathy for the human condition as I am not always consistent with words or actions myself. At times, the dragons I thought I conquered are still dragons hiding … Continue reading

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asexual

It’s interesting to be In Love with someone and not have, or even want, a sexual relationship with them despite the sensual and erotic nature of that relationship. perhaps it came into its own as a functional replacement for the … Continue reading

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